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Can We Be Healthy Without Being Happy

 

 

 

Can We Be Healthy
Without Being
Happy?

 

The Answer is No!

Cicero, the great Roman philosopher once said “The diseases of the mind are more numerous and more destructive than those of the body”. It is not mere philosophy but a medical truth also that nervous problems are more common than all other illnesses combined. There is long list of physical and mental sufferings, which are not rooted in organic dysfunction caused by viral or bacterial infections. Instead, they are caused by one’s own negative thinking–fear, anxiety, insecurity, anger, feeling of deprivation, loneliness, boredom, jealousy, purposelessness or for that matter any thinking that evokes an unpleasant feeling in a person. 

It is among these Negative Thinkers that you will find hysterics, chain smokers, alcoholics, drug addicts, sleep-walkers, insomniacs, cynics, chronic scoffers, nagging husbands or wives, too fat or too thin, obsessive-compulsive people suffering many manias and phobias, and people suffering from ulcer, high blood pressure, arthritis, diabetes to count only a few. In fact a new terminology has come to describe the ailments caused by the negative thinking. They are now called “Emotionally Induced Diseases”.

EMOTIONALLY
INDUCED DISEASES.

Research findings are unequivocal in suggesting that:

  • Headaches, 

  • Backaches,

  • Ulcers,

  • Hypertension,

  • Rashes,

  • Skin eruptions,

  • Cramps,

  • Fleeting pains,

  • Ear, Nose and Throat problems

  • Depression; are some of the most common afflictions we inflict upon ourselves by our lack of Rational and Emotional maturity.  

 

In what way our
Rational and Emotional Maturity
Becomes a Determinant of Our Health?

The sole purpose of this brief write up is to answer this crucial question by explaining to you the correlation that exists between Negative Thinking, Happiness and Health.

OUR BODY
THE BEST CHEMICAL FACTORY

In order to understand the nature and causes of EIDs, we must understand the role and functioning of the GLANDS–the chemical factories that nature has placed inside us. Each gland is a wonderful factory producing the chemical–the hormone–we need for the growth, repair and maintenance of our body and mind or in other words to keep us physically and mentally fit. In a happy and healthy person, the production of hormones in these factories is normal and well balanced. But if a person is ill or emotionally surcharged, some of these glands over supply the hormones while other produce less in order to cope with the ailment, be it a physiological disorder or emotional stress and strain. Let us take a few examples of how our glands help us to cope with some commonly experienced emotions like FEAR, ANGER, SADNESS, FRUSTRATION etc

Have you observed that whenever you are confronted with a sudden danger, (real or imaginary) there is a strange feeling in your stomach. Why? Because your adrenal glands are supplying you an extra dose of hormone to cope with the situation. They are giving you extra energy to prepare you for any quick action. Recall your mental and physical state when you had gone into a fit of anger–pounding heart, red face, hardened muscles, 'butterflies' in the stomach, sweating etc. Why this metamorphosis? Again, all these changes are brought about by your adrenal glands. Whenever you are angry, they release a hormone that sends blood to your brain, eyes and muscles where it is needed. They shut down your digestion for the time being so that the parts of body involved in anger get more blood. What happens when you cry, when you are sad or suddenly meet with an unexpected joy? The answer lies again in the hormonic support of your glands by supplying you the very special hormones (tears), for helping to cope with such situations. 

The Pancreas, is a large digestive organ located below the liver. It produces strong digestive juices neccessary for assimilation of food. It's one small portion known as the "tail" of the pancreas has an entirely different function, for it belong to endocrine glandular system. It secretes two hormones, insulin and glucagon. Insulin has much to do with the metabolism of the body. It is produced in the beta cells of the pancreas. Insulin is the powerful hormone that aids the body in strong nutriment, instead of allowing it to drain away in the urine.  

Located right in the middle of the head behind the eyes and above the nose, is a tiny organ no larger than a good-sized pea. This is the pituitary gland, in some respects the most important endocrine glands in the body. It takes orders in part from the central nervous system. The pituitary produces many different hormones, most of them direct the activities of the other endocrine glands of the body.

If you place your fingers on the front of your neck just below the larynx or “Adam apple” you may feel a small mass of butterfly-shaped tissues on each side of your windpipe. This is the Thyroid Gland.

Just behind the thyroid gland on each side of the neck, there are several tiny pin-sized organs known as Parathyroid.

It is now an established fact that a person’s emotions affect his digestive processes. People who are tense, nervous and those who are short tempered and always feel a little angry make more hydrochloric acid than people who are calm and easy-going. The overproduction of hydrochloric acid not only adversely affect the digestive system but is also a potential cause of the peptic ulcer.

Then there are certain Functional (psychosomatic) Diseases, which are not organic diseases but caused purely by the negative feelings or by the situations that we wish to avoid. In fact, the state of brain and nerves are the main cause of the functional diseases. In some persons, (mostly weak and sentimental) their mind unknowingly tells the body to mimic a disease whenever they are confronted with some unpleasant situations. Accordingly, though the body organs remain in order, they start functioning badly. You must have observed some children getting sick during the examination days. Why? Because of anxiety. You might have seen some people who get sick just before going to their jobs. Why? Because they are pushed to and not pulled by their jobs because they don’t like it. It is not uncommon for individuals to become mysteriously sick when confronted with some difficult circumstances or to postpone an illness when becoming sick is simply not warranted by the circumstances they are in, and collapse soon after when they are out of those circumstances.

Our Emotions 
Controls Their Supply

In essence, the various glands in our body either over supply or stop the supply of certain hormones for enabling us to overcome any physical or emotional strain. What we must understand very clearly is the fact that each of such occasions creates a hormonic imbalance in our body chemistry. If the frequency and the duration of such episodes is once in a while, no harm is done to our body as the chemical balance is restored as soon as the episode is over. But once these once-in-a-while turns into a habitual state, it first destroys our happiness and then our health.

Research is still on to establish as to what type of emotional stress gives which type of Emotionally Induced Disease. For example, they suggest that a perpetual state of boredom and loneliness can cause skin rashes and itching. A prolonged state of worry and anxiety may cause ulcers. An unending sense of insecurity in matrimonial life may induce arthritis in ladies in middle age. Losing the sense of purpose may lead to acute depression. In sum and substance, what these researches are underlining is a basic truth that a constant state of tension and unhappiness is the mother of not one but many diseases some of which have been listed in the beginning of this chapter. It is also an aggravator of perhaps all diseases in general, and Diabetes, Blood Pressure, and Arthritis, in particular.

Don't Abuse 
Your Supportive System

The wisdom demands from us that we bridle our negative emotions by developing our potential rational and emotional maturity–the twin qualities the Mother Nature has given to distinguish us from animals. The good news is that most of the physical diseases are now cured much before the hormonic or chemical imbalance created by them could give us secondary diseases. Ironically, it is the unhealthy attitude towards life–negative feelings either about others or about our own self– that most of us are unable to control. As a result, quite a few of us live under a perpetual state of dissatisfactions, disappointments and unhappiness. And the bad news is that this unhealthy attitude has assumed the status of an epidemic these days. Yet it is the negativism in life that has to be controlled for remaining Healthy and Happy. The need is obvious; the control is difficult.

The Need

As has been stated earlier, each negative feeling is a push button for the chemical factories–the glands in our body. If a person lives under a perpetual state of one or more invalid emotional stresses, he/she is overtaxing his/her chemical factories by making demands on them to over secrete certain hormones. And for understanding the consequences of such overtaxing, you don’t require the knowledge of medical science but only commonsense, which tells us in quite unambiguous terms that no system–be it nature-made or man-made can work for long beyond its designed capacity.

The Cure

The cure of Emotionally Induced Diseases begins with the realization that EIDs, as the very name suggests, are self-afflictions, which only the immature and the weak personalities impose upon themselves. Remember that it is our mind (brain) that controls the production of the chemical factories that the nature has located inside of our bodies. In turn, the SELF–the ‘I’ in us–controls our mind. And the SELF is made and developed by the LEARNING we undergo in the school of life. The learning gives us our perception–our unique way of looking and interpreting reality. There is an old saying that Beauty lies in the eye of its beholder. Similarly what makes us happy and unhappy lies in our mind’s eye–the perception or our first stage thinking. Appreciate the hidden wisdom behind the Shakespearean dictum: “Nothing is good or bad but our thinking make it so”. HOW?

For understanding it, you must know the basic difference between the physical and psychological transactions that take place every day in our lives. In physical transactions, there is only:

ACTION––REACTION.

Somebody hits you–the action–and it would cause pain in your body–a natural reaction irrespective of the motive of the hit. But the psychological transactions are not that simple and straight. Instead of two-staged they are three-staged transactions involving:

ACTION––INTERPRETATION––REACTION.

 What makes us happy or unhappy, comfortable or uncomfortable, relaxed or stressed, hopeful or hopeless, enthusiastic or depressed and such other dichotomous feelings depends entirely on our interpretation of each situation/transaction. If interpreted negatively or irrationally they are bound to bring us unhappiness.

By becoming unhappy,
you suffer two harm: The one over which
you did not have any control and the other, the
loss of your happiness over which you have full control.

Wisdom Redefined

No animal works for its own unhappiness or destruction. Man does. It appears that in the art of living, he is still at the stage of work-in-progress.  Man had to change the definition of wisdom many times. When he was directly depended on the mercy of nature, wisdom meant his ability to cope with the wrath of nature. When he could protect himself against the fury of nature with the help of science and technology, this definition lost its meaning. Wisdom was redefined as the ability of man to look into the future. Then came the electronic age which made ‘looking into future’ much more easy. The definition again became redundant. Finally, wisdom was defined as man's ability to remain happy. And perhaps, this definition may never require a change because as:

“Burning is the proper
function of fire so happiness
is the proper aim of man's existence”

It is a strange paradox that on some aspects, our knowledge is inversely proportionate to their importance. Unfortunately, happiness belongs to this category. It remains the most talked, the less understood and the least practiced philosophy of life. The reason is that very few of us try to define it and understand its requirements. Our saints and sages had been telling us that happiness is a state of mind. Indeed, it is a state of mind but how this state of mind is achieved is a moot question?

Let Us
Define Happiness

It is crucial, therefore, that we first define happiness and then search the road that leads to it. First the definition:

Happiness is that state of the mind
 in a person that does not suffer any guilt
and deprivation and never desires anything that he/she
does not deserve in terms of his/her talent, toil and perseverance.

The above is our definition of happiness. It is not necessary that you agree with it. But you must agree to have an understandable definition, the contents of which can be achieved by your own efforts.

THE ROAD
TO HAPPINESS

You don’t have to be a saint to achieve this state of mind. You have to be only rationally convinced that happiness is not a divine gift; it is an achievement of a rationally and emotionally matured mind. It is an achievement of a mind that fully understands the divine key determinants of happiness and adopts and implements them in his/her day-to-day life. In operational terms, it means the acceptance of the following realities of life. They are the important milestones on the road to happiness.
 

Let Us Start Our Journey
 

Milestone: One

Nothing is free in this world. Everything has its own price. Only the payment terms and currencies differ.

Thus in order to be happy:

We must
never aspire
anything for which we
 are not willing to pay the price.

 

Milestone: Two

AS A COROLLARY TO THE ABOVE, there exists an input-output relationship  in  everything. 

To be happy:

We must never
 hope a reward (the output)
 disproportionate  to our efforts (the inputs).

 

Milestone: Three

Help is a dirty word. Nobody helps or obliges anybody. The reason is simple. Help  means  sharing  of  your resources– physical or emotional–with somebody without any compulsion on us. If we have to give any thing to anybody under compulsion, it is not help; it is plain and simple robbery. Thus, it is by our own choice that we share our resources with anybody.

WHY DO WE GIVE? It is innate in us that we give only when giving (the price) gets us some return (value). It can be either in cash or kind –money, happiness or goodwill.

IN EITHER CASE, we get the return. The so- called ‘help’, therefore, is nothing  but  the price we pay either for the love or regard we have for the recipient of our help, or the cost we    pay earning  his/her    goodwill. Duty is another dirty word as implicit in it is a degree of compulsion. Nobody enjoys doing anything under compulsion, and if one does, it is no more compulsion or duty. One is doing it because in doing it lies his/her own satisfaction and happiness. Duty, in fact, is a double tragedy. It makes it  doers   unhappy on the one hand, and insults object, on the other. For example, ask any parents their feelings if they are told that their children are socializing them as their duty and not because they enjoy doing it!

Thus to be happy:

We must always
treat ‘help’ and ‘duty’ as
 four-letter words. Help makes
 us arrogant and demanding. It hatches  in 
us undue  expectations from the ‘helped’. Even
worse, it makes us unhappy when those expectations
are not fulfilled. The choice for us is simple. Either we
don’t share our resources with anybody or we don’t
expect anything more than what we have already got in return: Their Love or Goodwill.  

 

Milestone: Four

Impotent anger is one of the most futile emotions. In order to be happy, let us follow the advise of Chankya, one of the intellectual giants, India has produced :

We must
either develop
the competence to
change, avoid or destroy the object
 of our anger or the forbearance to endure it.

 

Milestone: Five

Love does not mean possession or control nor it is a balance sheet where both, the debit and the credit must balance. Instead, it is an affection of our mind caused by a thing or a person who delights us. Love is self-rewarding.

Therefore, if we want to be happy:

We must
never put strings
to our Love. The choice
we have is only one:
To Love or Not To Love.

 

Milestone: Six

HYPOCRISY is the most difficult and nerve-wrecking art of impressing others. Like a hobby, it can not be practiced at one’s spare  moments; it is a whole time job that keeps its performer at his/her tenterhooks whole his/her life.

EVEN WORSE, hypocrisy and self-respect can never co-exist in the same person. In fact, it is the lack of self-esteem that mothers hypocrisy. It makes its practitioner an imposter. In effect, hypocrisy or the pretentious behaviour buries our true personality and breeds in us a sense of inferiority and guilt.

To be happy therefore:

We must
always be authentic
in presenting ourselves
to others. Playing a double
role whole our life can never
 make us happy. Let us always remember
 what MK Gandhi said: “Happiness comes when
 what you think, what you say, and what you do, are in perfect harmony”.

 

Milestone: Seven

IT IS STATING THE OBVIOUS that the fear of insecurity can never give us security. It can, however, cripple us psychologically. The word ‘Security’ as is used by most of us refers to the External Guarantees against the unknown future contingencies of life that money can buy. This presupposes that we  know or can know what is going to happen to our life in the future. It is this presupposition that makes the whole concept of security a myth. YET, WORRYING ABOUT IT is endemic in our culture. We had the opportunity of working very intimately with some billionaires. To my utter surprise, I found them as much insecure as their middle class counterparts, though their reasons for and the areas of insecurity differ.

IT LEADS US to the inescapable conclusion that external security is myth or a mirage.  Running  after  it will  only  make  our  present life worrisome.

We must, however, be careful not to confuse worrying about security with planning for the future. Planning, in effect, is creating our own future based on our objectives, values, and above all, our competence.

In order to be happy:

Let us
understand the
nature of our true security.
Its name is self-confidence or Internal
 Security. It means our unshakable trust in our
own ability to handle any eventuality even without
 having any external security. In operative terms,
It means achieving excellence in dealing with our today.

 

Milestone : Eight

Money to lead a life without deprivations is indeed a  basic requirement. But let us never ignore the wisdom of this small but very meaningful saying: “For whom money becomes an end, happiness becomes the means”. The reason is very simple. When money becomes an end, we lose the sense of propriety in earning it. It gives birth to avarice and all the evils associated with it. 

In order to be happy:

We must have
as much money as we can
without the use of force and fraud
in acquiring it. Money earned without using
 force or fraud can never give us a sense of guilt–a
pre-condition for the unmitigated happiness.

 

Milestone : Nine

One of the potential sources of our unhappiness is our blind participation in the Rat Race. ‘What others have’ concern us more than deriving happiness from what we have. “We should have what our neighours have” typifies our approval seeking behaviour. Once we make ‘what others have we must have’ our need, we are in for unhappiness because there is no end to this race without any destination.

This is not to say that we lead an austere life, fulfilling only our basic needs. Far from it, we must have as rich a life as our resources permit provided it is a life decided by our own values, priorities, and resources rather than a life imposed upon by others.            

In order to be happy:

Let us develop the habit of comparing
 what we have and others don’t;
 not the other way round.

 

Milestone : Ten

Above all, to lead a happy life, we all require a purpose to live. Purpose gives us the necessary motivation to live. It gives meaning to our life. It is our powerhouse that supplies all the power we need to achieve what we wish to achieve. Without purpose, life is like a road that does not have any destination. Without a purpose, life becomes a burdensome and a boring tale devoid of any excitement, without any interest, without any pleasure, without any challenge, and without any happiness.

In order to be happy:

We must
have a well chosen
 and a well defined purpose
 which we would like to pursue
at each stage of our life.

 

Happiness Destroyers

Let us conclude this section by sharing with you the Cicero’s wisdom in identifying the six main destroyers of human happiness:

¨     The delusion or mistaken belief that personal gain is possible only by crushing or cheating others.

¨     The tendency to worry about things that can not be changed or corrected.
¨     Insisting that a thing is impossible because we can not accomplish it.
¨     Refusing to set aside the trivialities.
¨     Neglecting development and refinement of the mind by refusing to think and introspect.
¨     Attempting to compel others to believe and live as we do.


Nobody
can make you unhappy
Without Your Consent


Happiness is the purpose of your life,
pursue it with your total commitment.

 
 
 

 

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